All my life I’ve lived with my secret. Lived with the knowledge that at any moment I could be exposed and lose everything in the process.
To any outside observer I am an ordinary college student. A guy who is a bit on the skinny side perhaps, who is a bit too focused in his studies and a bit too quiet to be seen. I’ve lived most of my life invisible, but my newest roommate is going to change all of that.
I can’t let him know my secret. He can’t find out what I’ve been hiding.
Liam was bound and determined to get to know me. He thrust himself into my life and in the process I grew to rely on him, to rely on the idea that I just might have a life that was something other than work and study, but how would he react if he knew the truth?
Knew that in a moment I could shift and become someone new. Knew that in a moment I could become something far more beautiful and feminine than the roommate he had grown to trust.
I can’t let him know, can’t lose the friendship that I’ve built. I can’t let him see the me that I keep hidden, the woman inside of me that is begging to be unleashed and to taste the forbidden fruits that I had so long denied to her. I’m so close to finding out a cure, to putting her behind me forever and becoming the person I want to be.
But I don’t know who that person is anymore, because each time I’m her it feels so right. Each time she takes control I find myself enjoying it more and more, giving in to what she needs and wants and craves.
And what she wants more than anything is to be with my roommate.
Excerpt
With a flutter in my heart, I looked up at him. My eyes flickered shut and my lips parted and I felt him kiss me. I felt the touch of his lips on mine, the thrill of him touching me and tasting me and the rush that ran through my body as I felt us both come alive.
He kissed me, and he touched me.
Hands on my hips tentative at first but then gradually tensing. Gripping me and pulling me forward into his body as he kissed me with more ardent passion. I pressed my hands into his chest, kneading the muscle and feeling the taut tenseness of him beneath my touch.
Losing myself for a moment in the moment, I moaned into him.
Liam pulled back from me and my eyes flickered open. I locked sight with him, feeling a blush rising in me of embarrassment. I can’t believe that I’d lost control like that, but at the same time it felt amazing to have him on me and I knew that I wanted more.
“Kiss me,” I begged him, slipping my hands up to run around the back of his head and bury themselves in his hair, “Please kiss me.”
He gave me what I desired, his lips finding mine and chasing the passion as we swayed back and forth on the spot. I felt his touch on me grow bolder, feeling his hands drift down to find the cheeks of my ass and hold and then squeeze them tight.
A rush of excitement ran through me, a thrill that bubbled from deep inside of me and made me writhe in his grasp. I moaned again into him but this time there was no embarrassment, there was only need.
He sensed it and Liam continued his explorations, running his hands up to the small of my back, but under the cover of my clothing.
When I’d escaped to my bedroom I’d tried to find a close approximation of the clothing that I’d been wearing before, just more appropriately sized for the female version of my body. I’d selected a neutral t-shirt, a pair of jeans, and a baggy hoody.
In his explorations he went right beneath the hoody and the shirt, finding my skin and pressing into the small of my back with his fingers.
We were kissing, lips parted and breathless, but somehow the touch of his hands on my bare skin was so much more intimate. It was so much more intense to have that, the feel of his bare skin on mine a taste of what was going to come.
Suddenly I felt like I was bogged down by my clothing. I felt like it was weighing on me and I needed to be rid of it. I needed to be bared to him and to the world, with a need that bordered on pure unadulterated desperation.
I pressed back from him, giving myself just enough space to grip my sweater and tug it over my head. When I revealed myself to him his eyes went wide and I realized why: Liam had never really seen this body before.
I had always been disguised, hiding under baggy men’s clothing and then hiding under more form fitting but still baggy clothing as a woman. That disguise had kept the true nature of me hidden from him, and now he was seeing the real me for the first time.
Some of me, not all of me. Not enough to satisfy him.
I could see the hunger in his eyes and that made me feel amazing. No one in my life had ever looked at me the way that Liam was looking at me now, no one that I wanted to look at me at least.
His eyes locked onto my breasts, perky but unburdened underneath the thin fabric of my shirt. I hadn’t put on a bra, figuring that I was wearing a sweater anyways so there was no sense in covering up too much.
How very wrong I was.
His eyes on my body excited me and I felt my nipples harden. I saw him notice, his eyes widening and he took me in and I crooked a finger under his chin and turned it up to see my face.
To see me bite my lip and tease him.
Liam attacked me with hunger. His hands pulled me into him as his lips found my neck and kissed me hard and intense there. I felt him pull his hands out from the small of my back and they roamed in separate ways, one traveling up my back to find its place in my hair and the other slipping around the front to achingly tease it’s way up my stomach.
I was tense. I was vibrating. I needed him to touch me.
I needed it so bad.
“Yes,” I moaned for him, feeling him press on, “Yes please god yes.”
Everywhere he touched me left a trail of fire in me, left my muscles tense and taut with anticipation. Begging for more from him.
Begging for everything from him.