The fantasy hit me hard, sinking in its talons and dragging me down to the depths of it. I didn’t know how much I needed it until I was staring at it happening in front of me. My wife with another man.
I love Jenny and she is my everything but sometimes everything isn’t enough. I knew I was taking a chance when I suggested going to this swingers club and I thanked every god I could think of that she said yes.
I didn’t think she would go this far.
She disappeared when I stepped away and I went searching for her. Searching through countless rooms of people I didn’t recognize. All of them entangled in a fantasy I’d kept secret for so long and the only thing that propelled my feet forward was the knowledge that she couldn’t possibly do this to me.
She couldn’t be with him.
That handsome and intense man who only had eyes for her. Who had bought us drinks and chatted her up.
But all of the people in this place had been watching because they knew his reputation and knew that he would put on a good show. They wanted to watch.
I’m on the top floor now, where nothing is left undone. I’m walking down this hallway passing scenes that I could never imagine and that’s when I hear it. Her voice calling out but not to me. Confessing a truth I’m not ready to hear.
What will I see when I walk through this last doorway? Will I be able to come face to face with my fantasy?
Will it be enough?
Excerpt
When I passed down each hall without a sight of them, when I peered in each open door and exhausted all chances that they could be here I finally admitted the possibility. As I stood at the bottom of the stairs up to the third and final floor and began my ascent I finally admitted that maybe I had missed out on my interpretation of my wife, that maybe she was far more willing to explore than I had given her credit for.
But I still held out hope that I was wrong.
This was the public floor, after all, the rooms were bigger and there were seats around the edges of them for people to watch. Maybe they’d come up here to catch a show or maybe I was wrong about all of it and they were still down on the ground floor in one of the other bars. Maybe this was all innocent. Maybe he was just giving her a tour.
I knew that it wasn’t the truth, but for the time being it was at least a pleasant lie.
As I mounted the top of the stairs doorways greeted me down a long hallway. They were spaced farther apart than each of the rooms on the second floor, and all of a number they were open but none of them inviting. I walked forward, peering into rooms where elegantly appointed people sipped drinks around the edges while open debauchery played in the middle. People strung up and whipped. People bent over and begging for more. Whole groups of people laid out on large beds and taking pleasure in the companies of the flesh.
I felt like I was in a trance, drawn forward past all of these sights and turning the corner I heard a voice I recognized, the voice of my wife caught amongst all of them in this place breathless and begging.
“More.”
I moved quickly to the doorway it came from and turned, and the sight I saw will be forever burned in my mind.
Unlike the other rooms there was no furniture in this one, the floor was padded lightly in the middle but it was empty otherwise.
There were people in it, people I recognized from the bar all gathered around the edges chattering amongst themselves as they watched the show play out. None of them noticed me as I stood there in the doorway frozen and watching.
Watching Jenny in his arms. Jenny whose dress was pushed off of her shoulders and was hanging on to the tips of her breasts. Who was flush with need and whose hands were on this man while his were on hers.
Mitchell.
Jacket discarded to the floor and shirt partially unbuttoned he had his arms on her waist and was pulling at her with hunger. His lips were on hers for a moment and then chased away to taste her body. Her neck and her collarbone and down to meet his hands as they traveled up to meet her breasts.
He tugged her dress down and there was a gasp from one of the watchers. His greedy lips found her nipple and pulled it into his mouth and she tangled her fingers into his hair and pulled him into her as she arched her back and hissed out.
“Oh god yes.”