I was nervous when we brought these guys home, nervous even though I wanted this. Staring at her across the room while my man kissed my neck. Panic pounding in my chest because he doesn’t know the secret I’m hiding beneath my dress.
I’ve been in love with my roommate since the first day I met her, but she never had any interest in me. She helped me get dates, set me up with her friends, played at being my wingman while staying out of my love life and I never knew why.
And after another bad break up she tells me her secret. She tells me that she’s not what I think she is. She shows me her proof, what her dress hides between her legs. She tells me that she can make me a sissy just like her.
I don’t know why I let her talk me into this but I can’t deny the appeal. I feel delicate and femme and right in so many ways. And the guys hitting on us at the bar are a thrill, but when we take two home I don’t know what they’ll do when they find out what they’re hiding.
I love the feel of him on me but I’m afraid. I don’t know if I can go all the way here. I don’t know whether I can give in.
She tells me she can help me. She tells me she can be my guide. She makes me into the woman I’m meant to be and brings me pleasures I could never imagine.
I could live a lifetime in this moment. Pretty in pink, shiny and new, and every bit the woman I need to be.
Excerpt
Dave was the first to turn to me, “It’s nice to meet you, Molly. I haven’t seen you around before.”
“Oh yeah,” I said quickly, trying to keep from panicking, “I’m new.”
He smiled broadly, “You look it, shiny and new.”
There was hunger in the way that he looked at me. Desire for me that I couldn’t quite get a hold of.
Troy, Troy had eyes only for Lizzie. But Dave wanted me and I knew it.
He sensed my nerves, knew that I might rabbit at any moment. So with a final smile, both men turned back to Lizzie and engaged her in conversation, letting me get comfortable.
I think all told we were maybe there fifteen minutes talking. Lizzie obviously knew both of these guys and they were obviously on friendly terms, and she was playing them so expertly that it was a sight to behold.
Flirting in such an obvious way, I’d seen it happen before but it all looked so different with the context I had now. It was all so much more now that I knew what secrets she was hiding. It seemed somehow so much more… courageous.
I wondered whether I would ever be that comfortable. Whether I would ever be that confident. I found myself wishing and hoping that I could one day be even half the woman she was, then she went and said something that made me nearly spit my drink onto the table with shock.
“Oh come on we all know this place has crappy drinks,” she whispered quietly, conspiratorially, “You know we have way better drinks at our apartment.”
With that she made eye contact with me and she winked, and I knew exactly what her plans for the evening were.
The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.
This was not the someone that I anticipated.
I was following along, torn in my mind on what to do. As we walked out of the bar and naturally coupled up Dave kept up a patter about his life that was clearly more about filling the silence and making me comfortable than it was about him just egotistically talking about himself.
And I appreciated him for that, but my eyes were on Lizzie practically hanging off of Troy ahead of me and I barely even noticed until Dave snaked his arm around my waist and pulled me close.
“Sorry,” he said, “Should have asked first, but you looked cold.”
“I am,” I admitted quietly, feeling his hard and strong body next to mine, “And this is… this is nice.”
It was nice, and that was almost the problem. The part of me that was stuck in my old ways was screaming about how I wasn’t supposed to like this and I wasn’t supposed to want this but the other part, the part that wanted to explore my new possibilities. Well, that part wanted this to happen.
It was a question of lines drawn in the sand. Limits to what I was willing to do.
It was a question of what I really wanted and what would make me feel comfortable and right now I knew with a certainty that there were no limits for me.
I wanted Dave. I thrilled at the feel of his strong body holding me. Visions and thoughts of him above me taking me again and again pressed into my mind, flashing with the sort of certainty that I couldn’t ignore.
But in all those visions I was Molly, in every way a woman. I was scared because I didn’t want to know what would happen when he slipped that rough hand up under my dress and found what I was hiding. When he stripped me bare and found that I wasn’t the person I was pretending to be.
Would he get angry? Would he be disappointed? I don’t know if my heart and my confidence could take that.
But we were pressing on regardless. In our building and in our apartment now and Lizzie was sitting on the arm of the lounge chair we had with Troy in the seat and I was on the couch with Dave beside me and the drinks we’d shown up to have had long since been forgotten.
And I watched as Troy pulled Lizzie down into his lap and kissed her. And I felt Dave moving onto me.
He turned my face to him and his lips were on mine in an instant and I melted into him. Pressing back against him heady and eager for more of him. I felt him grinning as he pushed me down, his hand on my ribs and then pushing upwards towards my breast and I moaned lightly, giving him the opportunity to press his tongue into my mouth.
He was on me fully now, pinning me down to the couch and I could feel his hand run down my stomach and onto my stocking clad thigh. Pushing upwards bit by bit, pressing at the hem of my dress and over the lacy tops of my stockings.