But that night was different.

For the first time in my life, I found myself curious about that idea. I found the thought of it oddly enthralling and when I let a moment pass where I even considered the possibility my mind took it the rest of the way automatically.

The bet with Rick was unspecific, and maybe that was our fatal flaw. When we slid up to the bar to get drinks I was only there for a moment before some other man slid his way in next to me and got my attention.

“Dance with me.”

His words weren’t a request, they were nearly an order and they were certainly an expectation. I smiled, more shyly than I’d like, and turned to Rick who was looking at me with a question in his eyes.

I firmly believe that unspoken communication can happen between people who are close, who know each other well or know each other for a long time. That moment was proof because without using his words Rick said to me that I could, if I wanted to. And without words, I told him that I did.

And I let that man sweep me off onto the dance floor. I let him hold me close and when his hands started to roam I didn’t push them away. He pressed his limits inch by inch, pushing closer and closer to my most sensitive places and when he got to the point where if he got any closer he would surely cross a line I had a choice to make.

Because my body was screaming out yes. It was loving the feeling of his firm grip and his strong hands on my figure. My body was telling me over and over again that this man, this stranger, could perfectly satisfy the ache in my belly and fill it in every possible way.

But my heart knew it would be wrong, so very wrong and so I twisted away from him only to fall into the arms of someone else. Another strong man, and another after that. Moving from one to the other like I was being passed about the club until I stumbled into familiar arms and Rick held me up and looked into my eyes and we had another moment of silent communication where I told him if he didn’t take me out of here right now I was going to do something we both would regret.

That night we stumbled through the door of our hotel room entwined and the sex was so different than any we’d had before and any we’d had afterward. I let him win, let him pound me into submission. I mewled and begged and gave him anything and everything that he wanted and when he was done with me we both lay panting, exhausted, and dripping with sweat and we never spoke of it again.

I can’t speak for Rick, but I thought about that night a lot. I thought about the one question I had that lingered afterward, the one thing that wasn’t answered for me.

Because I knew what I wanted, knew that I would have been only too happy to give those strange men everything and submit to them. But I didn’t know how Rick would feel about that.

“Serve without question.”

Those words of his echoed in my mind as he left me. They rebounded as I showered and put on my makeup, as I dressed up in the ridiculous outfit he’d chosen and watched the clock tick down the seconds until our guests arrived.

Did Rick realize how close they were to what I’d begged him for that night when we stumbled back to the hotel? Did he know how it would hit a button deep in my soul that I barely even understood? Did he know the potential that it would unleash in me, the rampant monster who roared out with a demand for continual and perpetual satisfaction? The woman who would give it all, just to have her cravings sated?

Did he know that he was playing with fire?